I am constantly surprised by the way God intertwines the threads of my life. I learned how to cross stitch a couple years ago. I am not very good at it because I don't practice enough. One of the things I enjoy about it is the fact that the back of the picture can look like crap. A tangled group of knots and pieces of string that appear scattered in a random mess. Then you flip it over and look at the front. There's a picture! An ordered, beautiful, colorful picture that has meaning.
God does that to my life. He takes all the knots that I tie myself into, all the random threads of things that I start and don't finish, all the strings that look like they go no where, and He turns them into a beautiful picture. A picture full of color and meaning.
All that twisting and turning and knotting hurts, though. When my body and heart are being looped around and I don't know which direction to go, when my soul has to trust that the God who made the universe will take the threads of my life and lead me into the places where the picture is visible on the other side, that's hard.
Everyone has periods of growing and periods of stagnation in their spiritual lives. At least, I know I do. I can look back on my life so far and see the times when I have been growing, changing, and discovering the exciting attributes of God's character. Then there are times I can see I have just been floating along, knowing that I am a child of God, but not really sensing where to go next.
The past few weeks have been one of those periods of growing. A season of looking at the face of my Creator and thinking, "Wow, Lord. There are no words. What you are doing in my life is something I can't even speak of, because I know it's going to turn into a beautiful picture." I know that. Right now there are a lot of knots. A lot of threads that need to be pieced together. Little by little corners of the picture are being sewn.
I'll try to share them as they come together. Just know that you have a picture God is weaving just for you, too. All the hurt, pain, and uncertainty will come together and be a picture for God to display on His wall, exactly the way you do with your children. You may not get to see the flip side anytime soon, but it will come. Trust Him.